May 22, 2010
Renegade of Funk
Reijin X. Kurataru
Time Lord, Other
None, but versed with swords and high-tech weapons.
Time Active, Senshi strength, strong insight
THIS PAGE SUPERCEDED BY Doctor X
In her quest for revenge against Sakura Xadium Aino, Sakura April determined that she was far too evenly matched with the girl to ever truly defeat her, as her mother, Eudial, has given her a skillset and knowledgebase equal and opposite to Sakura's own, but not superior. Determined to tilt the scales in her favour, and on the premise that the whole could be overwhelmed by the sum of its parts, Sakura April used the knowledge she possessed about Sakura's upbringing and development to compile a list of those people who had given her the skills she had used to come so far in life. Taking DNA from each of them, along with the severe willpower and discipline from rei.bot (who had no DNA), she melted down the body of Jack Dinsdale (nee Bad Wolf Xadium) to create the Ultimate Foe for Sakura-- someone who knew her better than she knew herself and had more power, drive and ambition to win. She merged this with the combined Mizuonmics intelligence database (the one you are reading now), and all the security logs of the goings-on in the house through all timelines so her new creation would be up to speed and aware of everyone's weaknesses.
Thus was born Reijin X. Kurataru, the ultimate assassin...
...unfortunately, Sakura April miscalculated. While Xadium's Time Lord Physiognymy and Sakura' Senshi strength took root as expected, rather than taking the arcane dark powers of Yaijinden, the lust for power of Jedite, the world-hating anger of Hotaru, the amoral scientific tendencies of Souichi Tomoe, and the battle-hardened nature of rei.bot, Reijin took the Insight of Yaijinden, Hotaru's love of literature, poetry and friendship, Professor Tomoe's insane curiosity, rei.bot's spiritual force and kindness, and Jedite's strong chin. He also inherited Sakura's cheery personality and sense of fun. The knowledge that had been implanted into him served to give Reijin a sense of kinship with everyone in the home as opposed to informing him of weaknesses to exploit.
Where Sakura April had hoped to breed violence and anger, only friendship and good humour arose. Where she had hoped to foster ultimate obedience, only a sense of iconoclasm and fun came to the fore.
Reijin immediately turned on Sakura April and took on a title, calling himself "The Impresario," stating as his goal the orchestration of events towards the ultimate goal of Maximum fun and happiness for all his friends.
The Impresario has the biology of a Time Lord [Xadium] with the strength of a Sailor Senshi [Sakura], and the ability to heal more rapidly, even from severe injuries than either [Tomoe]. He tires quickly, however [Hotaru] and thus likes to relax as much as possible, when possible. He may have the ability to master powerful ki attacks, and possibly manipulate energy [Jedite], but would need training in this regard. He considers himself nominally a Time Lord, but more importantly, as the first bona fide "child of the house" in the sense that he owes everything that he is to everyone around him [due to the information dumps]. Thus he is very protective of everyone in the home unless they turn on their fellows.
Due to Sakura April's inability to replicate the Rassilon Imprimatur, Impresario began to die shortly after using his healing powers, due to the various cells in his body battling with each other for dominance. The reappearance of long thought dead Noriko saved him however, when she gave her Rassilon Imprimatur to him.
Impresario's biology asserted itself as fully Gallifreyan and he expelled all the foreign biomass, causing him to lose most of his advanced healing factors.
Impresario is as fun-loving as Sakura with the odd mental tangents of a Professor Tomoe and a Yaijinden. He is a keen scientist with a very open spiritual sense, though sometimes he wishes the Spiritual World would stop complicating things. He can possess a keen mental focus [rei.bot] and has great empathy [Sakura], but can be roused to incredible anger if his friends are hurt or threatened [Hotaru]. Still, he would prefer to settle issues peaceably and in as light-hearted a manner as possible.
Due to a "Frankenstein" crack by ?, Impresario has developed an alias name, "Frank Impresario", stating that "it sounds like a Stephen J. Cannell TV Detective".
Impresario also has something of a history with Gemini Sunrise in his own future, but does not know what it is as it has not happened to him yet. He has coined this "that infuriating River Song Paradox".
A fic fragment that would have explained why what Gemini saw of Impresario's death was not all it appeared to be.
"Please don't go."
The Impresario looked at the girl with the red hair, friendly freckles and crystal-blue eyes sadly.
Gemini Sunrise. The cheerful cowgirl who'd time traveled from the past, but met him in his personal future. The one whose knowledge about him surpassed even his knowledge about himself. The one whose smile lit up his hearts with the greatest of ease.
Except today, her frown was breaking his hearts, and her eyes were filled with tears.
Her future knowledge. Her secret knowledge about his future, which had usually been used to poke fun at him, in a kind teasing manner-- that gift that had brought them together and made them happy-- he'd always known it had been tinged with some kind of darkness-- some kind of heavy weight that the girl had been unwilling to share with him. His rules, she'd said. Spoilers.
And this morning, as he peeked outside and saw the silvery, gleaming camper-shaped TARDIS that had been delivered to him by his friend Thrash, and saw Gemini's horrified reaction to it, he knew that that weight was about to come crashing down on him.
"I have to go, Gems," Impresario said quietly, confidently. "Whoever's done all these things to the world.... engineered that BP Oil Spill to give the Nestene Conciousness raw materials... blasted in the Indian Ocean to find ancient Atlantean weapons causing an earthquake in Canada... trapped Sakura and her family at some bogus vacation spot... they need to be stopped, and now I finally have a clue as to where they might be... San Francisco, August 1927."
Gemini just tried to still the pounding of her heart. This here was the other side of a conversation she'd had with Impresario-- or "Impy" as she affectionately called him-- when they'd first met. At the time she'd thought he was just babbling nonsense... but now it all made so much sense. She knew how this story would end, and she didn't want to see it happen!
Throwing her arms around Impresario, she kissed him deeply again and again, urging him backwards, away from the TARDIS and towards the bed. If she could just keep him from going...
The Impresario lovingly returned the kisses and stepped back a bit, but gently held his ground after that. He loved Gemini deeply, but he knew he had to go. And judging by how badly she was trying to stop him, things were going to get pretty rough indeed.
"Gems--" he began, breaking off the kiss.
"Impy! Y'wont make it!" Gemini protested. "Ah know what I saw! It's impossible!" She opened her mouth again, and Impresario knew that if she did, she would blurt out whatever she saw of the future-- and that was something that, as desperately as he wanted to know-- he could not, due to the Laws of Time that every Time Lord had to uphold.
"Gemini," Impresario said firmly, but at the same time with a softness he could only show to her, "Nothing's Impossible... just highly Improbable."
With that, he kissed her deeply-- perhaps for the last time, he reflected. As she closed her eyes, he whispered "I'm sorry," and pressed his thumb to a pressure point in the small of her back. As she crumpled, passing out, he caught her, and gently set her down on the ground.
"I'll be back," he whispered in her ear. "I promise." He kissed her on the forehead softly, taking a moment to brush her red bangs back into place.
Then he was gone, into the TARDIS.
- * *
The TARDIS Thrash had found him (how did a Time Lord get the name "Thrash" anyway, he wondered) was an older model, a Type 37 or so, and was a temperamental little thing. It was all The Impresario could do to keep the control console from bursting into flames when he pulled a lever or flicked a switch.
With a series of loud, grating, shuddering groans, the TARDIS finally took its first steps in a long time and Dematerialized, reappearing some minutes later at its destination.... hopefully.
Popping his head out the door, Impresario sighed. It had all been for nothing. The thing hadn't moved at all. Gemini was outside with her horse Rally, looking at it in fascination.
"Sorry to make you worry, Gems," Impresario sighed. "It looks like this old heap is useless after all."
"Old heap?" Gemini asked in shock, still marveling at the shiny metallic siding on the TARDIS exterior. "This is th' shiniest silver Ah ever seen!!" She looked at Impresario curiously. "And... whadidya call me, Mister?"
Impresario ignored her, too wrapped up in giving Rally a sugar cube from his pocket as was his habit. The horse snorted happily and ate from his hand.
"Rally likes you, mister!" Gemini said with a cheery smile. "Ya got a way with horses! Mah name's Gemini, by the way!"
It was about this moment that Impresario realized the TARDIS had worked after all. He also realized that finally, after several months, he finally had the informational edge on Gemini, knowing more about her than she knew about him. He couldn't help but grin.
"Gemini Sunrise," he began importantly. "So good to meet you for the first time!"
Gemini blinked. She hadn't told him her last name? "Do you know me, Mister?" she asked curiously.
"So is this San Francisco? Or are we in Texas?" Impresario countered, deflecting the question for now. "Is it August 1927?"
Gemini blinked a few times. This guy was weird, but in a funny way. She laughed it off. "It's July, mister. An' this is Louisana." While she had gotten the month right, Gemini, having no sense of direction, was completely wrong about what state they were in, but Impresario took her at her word, not knowing any better himself.
The Impresario frowned. "Tch, off course a bit." He patted the TARDIS.
Gemini tilted her head curiously and peered in the front door of the trailer-shaped machine. She gasped. The inside looked much larger than the outside.
"That's a neat trick, mister!" she exclaimed.
The Impresario grinned. "That's no trick, mein Samurai."
Gemini froze. "H-how'd you know ah was a Samurai?" She looked at this guy in shock. _Who was he?_
Impresario grinned even more, loving not being at the "Stupid end" of a Temporal paradox for once. "I have a whale of a tale to tell you, Miss Sunrise..."
He waved to the interior of the TARDIS. "Have a seat, we'll talk."
Gemini nodded, and stepped inside. Gasping as she realized the thing really was bigger on the inside, she had the sense her life was about to change in a big way...
- * *
ONE MONTH LATER, AUGUST 1927
It was a sight out of a movie, Impresario thought. Looming out of the grey fog, a massive black hulk of iron girders and beams appeared, the skeletal beginnings of the Golden Gate Bridge...
"...Five years early." Impresario frowned.
"Huh?" Gemini asked, leaning on him a bit heavily. The last few weeks had seen them constantly fighting against a series of half-machine, half-demon, flying steam-powered machines called Japhkiels, all in an effort to protect the life of a small girl named Juanita from the clutches of a man named Patrick. The stress of the perpetual fight for survival, combined with the almost comedic rappoire the duo had developed almost instantly thanks to Impresario's foreknowledge of Gemini's habits had brought the two quite close together. It didn't hurt that Juanita encouraged it as well.
"This thing shouldn't have started construction until 1933..." Impresario mused., looking up at the bridge.
"Ah still find all this Time travel stuff hard t'swallow," Gemini replied with a frown.
"More machines are coming!" Juanita exclaimed, pointing towards the riverbed under the bridge.
"Dang Japhkiels!" Gemini exclaimed, unsheathing her sword and getting ready for another fight. "Impy, ya got that Sonic screwdriver thing ready?" She had been amazed the first time he'd used the tool to literally shake the armor on the machines to pieces.
"Quite..." Impresario said, voice suddenly trailing off.
"What is it, Impy?" Gemini asked, noting the sudden change.
Impresario pointed to one of the half-completed towers on the bridge. There, scrawled in the blood of Rassilon only knew how many unfortunate construction workers, written in Old High Gallifreyan, was one simple word. "Come."
"Can you handle them?" the Time Lord asked, looking towards the bridge. That word told him all he needed to know. His enemy was not only a Time Lord, but an old one at that. Old High Gallifreyan was basically a dead language.
Gemini looked at the wave of oncoming Japhkiel machines. There were only about 50, she could handle them without breaking much of a sweat. "Go on... but be careful!"
"Always," the Impresario said. He'd been having so much fun with Gemini the last few weeks he'd forgotten, for a time, the message he had received which had brought him here.
He flashed her a winning grin and headed for the bridge. As the monster machines advanced, however, the entire party found their way forced onto the bridge in any event, surrounded on both sides.
Standing on the edge of a raised platform, The Impresario looked down on the battle,. as Gemini cleared wave after wave of the enemy with powerful sword attacks that used her own spirit energy to unleash hellstorms of fire. She was truly a formidable fighter. It was no wonder, he knew, that she would be indispensable in New York just a little over from a year from now. So taken was he with watching her, that he completely missed a Japhkiel stomping up behind him.
Finally hearing it, he tuned, and aimed his sonic screwdriver at it, intending to vibrate the metal shell housing the demon inside to pieces. To his surprise, nothing happened.
"...Deadlocked?" He looked at the unit. Physically it looked no different than the others... but...
The Japhkiel opened up, revealing not its usual inhabitant-- a grafted in demon-- but a dark-skinned man in a sharp black business suit.
"...The Corruptor." Impresario recognized him from a horrific scene he had witnessed some weeks earlier. The Corruptor was a malevolent Time Lord who had been sentenced to death aeons ago, but somehow had had his essence preserved by the Black Guardian, only to be revived in the body of another unfortunate victim.
LOL THIS PART IS NOT WRITTEN YET BECAUSE I WAS WRITING THIS WHEN IT WAS MOSTLY ALL GUESSED BY LEGO AND RAARGH EPIC SHOWDOWN WAS HERE BUT OH WELL
He hit the ground with a sickening thud, smashing into a riverbank studded with construction supplies, and surrounded by walls of flame and burning Japhkiel debris. All around the bodies of the demons were frying in the heat, flesh bubbling and cracking. After blacking out for a few minutes, The Impresario regained consciousness. Spluttering and coughing, he mentally assessed his status.
Most bones broken, some internal organs ruptured, and skin was starting to blister. Not a good scene. Not at all.
"Sorry Gems... Cant't... keep my promise... after all..." he spluttered. She had been right, that morning so seemingly long ago. He shouldn't have come. He had been outfoxed, outmatched and overpowered at every turn. In his arrogance he had thought himself capable of single-handedly taking on perhaps the most dangerous scion of Gallifrey, and predictably, he had been completely defeated.
Vision fading, he smiled a bit as he realized his last thoughts would be of Gemini. He could see her there, in front of him... in that sharply pressed white suit, red shirt and white tie... and carrying a guitar. Not to mention being very much a man.
Wait. What? What. WHAT?!
"Yo!" the figure in white said, waving jocularly.
The Impresario coughed a bit, not really able to manage anything more in the way of vocalization. His incredulous expression conveyed all that needed to be said, anyhow.
"Oh, my appearance..." the figure in white said. "I borrowed the identity of a charming young man named Kayama. Not that that means anything to you, Time Lord."
Impresario blinked. How did this person know what he was?
"Well, mostly a Time Lord. You're a strange mix, you are." The man in white looked at him curiously. "You've managed to purge almost everything about you that is not Gallifreyan... but there's a little bit extra left. That must be why you haven't died yet."
The Impresario just lay there, rather bleeding over everything, hating the feeling of being on the stupid end of a conversation. This always seemed to happen to him.
"W-who..." he rasped, desperately trying to eke out an intellectual foothold in his sea of uncertainty. He might be dying, dammit... but he had to score a point somewhere.
"I, you stubborn child," the figure in white pronounced overly solemnly, "am The White Guardian."
The White Guardian. One of the two elemental powers behind creation itself, this one tasked with maintaining order in the face of the chaos sown by his counterpart, the Black Guardian. To say one was good and one was evil would be to grossly oversimplify the nature of their being; they both did what they needed to to maintain a balance in reality. If that meant bending a few arms in the process, then so be it. If that meant using people like pawns in their eternal game, so be it.
Slowly, Impresario pieced together what was going on. If The Corruptor had been placed back on the Galactic stage by the Black Guardian... then obviously the White Guardian would want a tool of his own...
"Tch," the White Guardian clucked. Impresario had put the pieces together already. This eliminated the need for him to make a speech, and he so did love the expositional part of his job. Annoyed slightly, he cut to the chase.
"You are a young, stupid boy. Months old, with the knowledge and skills of those hundreds of years your better. You're a cocky little brat who needs seasoning."
The Impresario looked up at the White Guardian with as much irritation as he could muster-- which at the moment, wasn't much.
The White Guardian picked up the Impresario, who could feel his bones slipping out of place. By Rassilon that hurt. A LOT. With a tap, the man in white healed most of Impresario's injuries, leaving a few niggling pains and aches to keep the Time Lord humble.
"You are to make your way back to 2010 the old-fashioned way," The White Guardian droned. "Time travel..."
"...at the rate of one second per second."
Impresario facefaulted. "B-B-But that'll take years!" he protested.
The White Guardian looked at his watch. "Yes it will, boy. Almost 83 of them."
The Time Lord looked at the White Guardian with a withering expression.
"Use that time to gain experience, insight and humility," the White Guardian chided. "And do stay out of the way of your female friend. Miss Sunrise has her own trials to overcome."
Impresario's face fell. The White Guardian saw this and chuckled. "She's stronger than you know, boy. More than you can possibly imagine." He considered. "Not bad for a human. You chose well! Anyway, you will meet again, when the time is right... assuming you survive the trip back." He chuckled.
The Time Lord sighed. "Very well. I have no choice, it seems."
"No," the White Guardian concurred. "No you really don't." He waved, and slowly vanished into the ether.
Sighing, the Impresario looked up towards the Golden Gate bridge. Up there, Gemini was still fighting the fight of her life against a hoard of Japhkiels. For a moment he pondered ignoring the guardian and climbing back up the bridge to help her. But as he saw rain after train of molten metal showering from above, and felt the explosions of her power being unleashed against them, he knew eh couldn't. This was her awakening as a warrior of justice, and she had to walk her path alone... for now. As he must.
Slowly, the Time Lord took one last look up and headed away from the riverbank, towards the setting sun. Behind him, the bridge began to slowly collapse and fall as a result of the battle, damage that would take so many years to rebuild and be so hard to explain that the local government would just rewrite history as to when the thing was actually built.
He did not see, but could feel, Gemini's gaze coming from a hilltop above, looking for him, for any sign of hope. He felt bad giving her none, but that was the way it had to be. One day, he'd see her again. He was sure of it.
Teardown / Enter Doctor X
Using brainwashed minions, The Corruptor caught Impresario and vivisected him, removing all remaining external DNA from his body, leaving him essentially a Xadium once more. However, Corruptor could not excise the willpower of rei.bot, and by removing all extraneous and conflicting factors, this new "Doctor X" had a much more powerful and focused spirit power than before, along with a clear restoration of his Gallifreyan Heritage.
See Doctor X for more.